D.E.P.R.E.S.S

sick of everything.
no hopes. sometimes i wonder.
i was trying harder and harder not to giving up.
i ain't a stone or a metal.
i got feelings too
i can't change you,
so i changed.
and it is so meaningless,helped nothing!
i shall let go everything.

E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G

i surely will miss everything about you.
thanks for everything.
i miss those days.
we were more towards like sisters or friends.
with laughter,joy.
sometimes we played.
sometimes you scolded me badly for no reasons.
sometimes i will  keep nagging you for some purpose.
i do miss!
but.is no longer here.
now,
you moves on to your new life and we are still here.
i won't let you to PULL us down
Selfishness
everyone born to have this,included me.
but please do think of other feelings before you do something or speak something.
well, i don't have to care anymore from now onwards ..
although i still have the strong feeling trying hard to pull back everything
maybe what he said is 100% the truth.
time will not come back to us.
i cried for you when you leave,
when you broke our hearts.
you don't even look back to us anymore.
you are free from now.happy?
you broke your promised to us and you DUMP us!
you left nothing for us.
no one could understand how you broke our hearts.
others may not understand how we feel..
they think we should forgive you and be happy for you.
what you did was really unforgiven!
somehow,i wish to see you again
somehow,my minds would tell me how much i miss you
somehow, i may cry for you again.(now,i cry)
somehow, i wish to call you again just like how i did it for almost 15 years.
BUT, i will never show all this infront of you anymore.
i won't tell you how much i miss you.
i won't hug you although i really wants to.
i won't show you how weak am i as before.
i won't let you to break their hearts again and again!
i know i must be fail to do this.




this is an emotional post.
i am so sorry for not accepting the truth for now.
i really need some time to cool down myself.
i will be fine.

CONGRATULATIONS!

finally,
congrats

oh,no

6.30 a.m early in the morning!
suppose having a sweet dream now
but I am still awake
having this much energy to blog here.
O.O

 

i used to be a SPM candidates.
this year,now,my sister is the one who taking SPM
am i the one nervous-ing for her now?
anyways....
wish her luck in every papers.

O.M.G

having tuition class each nights.
guess what,IT IS NOT BORING AT ALL
what i meant here is biology tuition classes of course.
what he teaches so far i can understand all.
i think the notes that he distributes is quite complete?
i haven't flick on my textbook or reference book actually.^^
spending two hours per day there totally is not a waste.
jeanne,lay wan, jine yee reminded me about holiday homework.

O.M G was appeared.
we have to attend to school for diagnostic test on 29th December-biology 
the first week of schooling days we have diagnostic test again.-chemistry
then, before holidays started,
biology teacher had met up with us and gave brief about next year..
dong dong!
not to mention her name here...
she ask us to buy past year question books 
and compulsory to finish up all the questions.
not to complaint about her here
i know what she did is all for our good purpose.
but, don't you think this is a little too much for us?
and yet we having our colloquium stuff and biology projects to finish too.
moreover,we have to do our chemistry exercises papers..
another her,said that we must done all the questions.
if we did not manage to finish it..
she want us to copy back the questions together with the answers for about 50times,
OR
if we got the wrong answers.do it the same way.
imagine how is our life going to be on next year
teachers is like chasing us into a bullet train.
=(
i haven't add on pengajian am and math homework.
i haven't touch on any single of it.
typing so much here.
only one word
LAZY kill me.
laziness is attacking me more and more.
and yet i am enjoying much here.
suffer will be the next it aim me.

waiting Sebastian to help me out in chemistry.
i am poor in everything now.

A Special World

A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us fiercely in its womb.

Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong

When I'm with you,
eternity is a step away,
my love continues to grow,
with each passing day.

This treasure of love,
I cherish within my soul,
how much I love you...
you'll never really know.

You bring a joy to my heart,
I've never felt before,
with each touch of your hand,
I love you more and more.

Whenever we say goodbye,
whenever we part,
know I hold you dearly,
deep inside my heart.

So these seven words,
I pray you hold true,
"Forever And Always,
I Will Love You."

Love isn't blind, it just only sees what matters.

Love is a moment that lasts forever...

You will know the real meaning of love when you fall in love.

If a tear fell from my eyes, every time i wished you were with me I would have a puddle of fallen wishes at my feet.

Through the wind I hear your voice, in the clouds I see your name. Living life without you just would not be the same

If you love someone more than anything,          Then distance only matters to the mind, not to the heart.

A LITTLE BY YOU

this is specially for the one who own my heart.


we used to be like a twins.
sticking to each others..
laughing together.
loving birds...
but now,
things aren't the same anymore.
day by day,
works getting more and more.

and yet our life getting busier at this stage.
this is going to be tough for both of us.
sometimes is hard for me stop contacting with you,
although i had promised you thousands of times,
still,i failed.
i feel uncomfortable when i can't reach you.
can you see How Important Are You In My Life?

sometimes,conflicts do happen between you and me.
i do not know what does all this shows.
but.i trust myself and i trust you too.
after each conflicts happen,
it makes me appreciate you more and more.
you gave me more than i need .
pamper me most of the time.
but, still so naughty hor? xD
maybe others do not know you well
but i did.
i cares about you a lots.
sometimes,maybe you just don't realize it.
anyhow, my loves will still belongs to you.
♥♥
lets make it till the end.
i l y


 

Life is unpredictable.

Just live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Forgive quickly.

Speak kindly.

Trust God whole-heartedly.

And you will live happily!
i am happy with what i have now.
i should have be satisfy already.
no use tears flow each nights.
i will be strong.
i ain't small anymore.
learn to face the world.
learn to growth.
should place myself in busy mood.
just like what others are doing now.
what lala said is right,
sometimes "sorry" is not enough. Sometimes you actually have to change.
what i meant here is about myself.
don't expect others to change for you,
it might be hard for others sometimes.
then why not turn into the other angle,
and realize it is your time to make a change?
=)
if you are reading my post,
yes you!
think about it.

By the way, I've watched Let Me In. It was about a 12 years old boy who develops friendship with a vampire child. It do not take any risk.QUITE boring somehow =)

 

 

You said you feel bad for not giving me anything. 
Don't ever feel that way because you don't have to.

Being able to put a smile on your face will always be the best thing I'll ever have.

I wont care about anything else and I wont care about what people say. 

All I want is for you to know that I love you since the first day we met. 

I love you so much and I always will.

my words

have finished my muet examination this afternoon.
did badly.
did some silly mistakes that i should not.
and it's over.
no use to talk about it anymore.
well,holidays is just around the corner.
everyone feels excited about it.
plan for their lovely coming holidays.
what about me?
i never think of it.
never think of any activities.
but only one came to my mind
some place
someone. 
♥
ouh
i need money.
money for shopping.
it's been a long time i stopped this habit.
i want to feel it again.
i need money!
money for bags,heels,clothes..
everything
grr >..<\\
i don't want him to see this sentences.
ngek ngek.
he poke me once he see me later.
buuu~~~


lots of work is waiting for me to touch on.
but laziness stopped me.=(
after one and a half months.
it's really the time to wake up and sacrifice few months time to work hard on my studies.
i know this is ain't SPM anymore.
i realize somehow this is ten times harder than the previous one.
everything will be so hard soon
but i am not alone =)
there's people's who work hard together with me.
to gain something,we tend to lose something as well.
to gain something great,we have to sacrifice more.
learn it.

craps
claps.




They can say anything they want to say , try bring me down ,
but i will not allow anyone to succeed hanging clouds over me and they can try how to make me feel that i don't matter at all but refuse to falter to in what i believe or lose faith in my dreams , 
cause there's a light in me that shines brightly . 
They can try but can't take you away from me , they can do anything they want to you if you let them in , but they won't ever win , if you cling to you pride and just push them aside .
See , I have learned ..
there's an inner peace I own something in my soul that they can not possess ,
so I won't be afraid and the darkness will fade there's light in me ..


I wish I could see through your eyes so I would know what you like to see.
I wish I knew your wishes, so I could give you everything you want.
I wish I dreamed the same dreams you do, and together we could make them come true.
I wish I knew what makes you happy, so I could make you the happiest person in the whole world. 
And lastly, I wish I were a cell in your blood, so I would be sure I was somewhere in your heart <3 ..

p/s
i am waiting for the time to past.
and waiting for the day to come.

♥ily♥

what is life all about

I realize something today. That is friends can be there for you but not always. I love my friends. But they can't be there for all the time cause they have their own needs in life. Even my best friends ignore me when they have someone else or a partner. It's okay because they have a life too. That I understand. Friends can never be there for you always that is what i realize. A relationship is so important cause the trust you gain from and give to your partner is overwhelmed. We all can earn trust from friends but it is different when you have your partner. This is because the trust you earn from or give to your partner, your life depends on it. It's not always because of reputation or pride. If you are then you're living in a lie. Always have to do things according to what people says. In a second you can lost all your friends but your partner will be there for you no matter what and yes we need friends that make us happy, fun, and confident. Do you want to have children with your friend or your partner? Advices from friends are very helpful at times but most important thing is to listen to your heart. Listen to it what it has to say. Trust your own instinct and feel. That is what so special the heart is. You have your own heart for a reason. It is to believe and trust your own self. Your life will be surrounded by rules if you create rules of your own for own self. Life is about taking risks and have faith. No matter what the outcomes are just stand up and live life like never before. How sucky your life is find a way, don't give up and be strong because there is more to come in life. You have only one shot in life so appreciate it and use it well. Having a partner is the most happiest and joyful moments of your life. Would you like to live in a miserable life? Fights and arguments are common in a relationship that would make the relationship stronger. Life is all about giving and taking. The love you shared to your partner can never be same as how you shared with your friends. Having a partner is special where you can go through all ups and downs together.The heart is always stronger than the mind. No matter how much you use your mind to ignore the problem you're facing, the heart is always be there to remind you the problem you're facing. The heart wants you to solve this problem and be stronger every each time you face another problem. This is how special the heart is.

the special heart of mine i have given to you

and yours came to me

we will make it through

i believe and i trust.

we will

make it till the end

i l y